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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30094329">Case Closed</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/j_majka/pseuds/j_majka'>j_majka</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Miraculous Ladybug</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Detective, F/M, Humor, marinette is just doen with everything, phone thief, sherlock chat</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 22:06:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,550</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30094329</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/j_majka/pseuds/j_majka</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Chloe's phone gets 'stolen' and its up to a reluctant Marinette and Chat Noir to try and piece together what happened and whodunit. Though Chat Noir isn't very good at this.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>54</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Totographs Zine</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Case Closed</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is my fic  for the Totographs Zine! I had a lot of fun working on it with inkiaoi. They made some pretty rocking art so go check out the zine! Special shoutout to the wonderful mods for creating such a lovely zine! Love y'all!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Marinette had become accustomed to the strangeness that was Paris. Daily akuma attacks. Space trash cans. Even being a ladybug-themed superhero. But nothing had prepared her for this.</p><p>She had just rushed back to class after a luncheon with the mayor, which had run late, only to find the entire class in a tizzy. She still wasn’t sure what was going on, but somehow Chat Noir was there and being forced to solve some kind of mystery. Though she had to wonder what Chat was even doing at the school, let alone so soon after the luncheon. </p><p>Marinette, having gotten caught sneaking into the classroom, had been chosen to help the superhero. She wasn’t really sure what was worse. The fact that her school had an entire Sherlock costume lying around or that Chat Noir decided to put it on in an attempt to, in his words, “get in character.” </p><p>Or maybe it was worse that he made her don a Watson outfit to complement his, otherwise they wouldn’t match. </p><p>Why did the school even have these costumes? They didn’t have a drama program. </p><p>“So, what seems to be the <em>purr</em>oblem here?” Chat pulled out a small brown pipe and blew into it. A flurry of bubbles erupted from the pipe, slowly floating down to the classroom floor. </p><p>“The problem is my phone is missing!” Chloé exclaimed, pushing her way forward. “And one of these clowns stole it!” </p><p>Most of her classmates either groaned or sighed. After having to deal with Chloé for almost four years now, Marinette could feel their pain. Honestly, this felt like the bracelet situation all over again.</p><p>Chat Noir hummed. “I’m going to need a place to conduct my investigation. Watson! Find us a room!”</p><p>Marinette rolled her eyes. “First of all, do not call me that. Second of all, where am I going to find an empty classroom in the middle of the day?”</p><p>“I bet you’re just stalling because you don’t want the investigation to point back to you being the culprit!” Chloé pointed her finger at Marinette, causing the class, including Chat, to gasp. </p><p>“Need I remind you that I couldn’t have done this?” Marinette retorted. “I wasn’t even here!”</p><p>Marinette had disappeared long before Chloé’s phone had gone missing in order to attend the luncheon.</p><p>Chat nodded. “That’s right. In order to have committed the crime, Marinette would’ve needed to be here. Thus, she couldn’t have done it.”</p><p>“Fine, maybe Dupain-Cheng didn’t do it, but I still don’t have my phone!” Chloé flicked her ponytail over her shoulder. “You can use Mr. Damocles’s office. I’m sure he won’t mind. After all, you’re a superhero and my dad’s the mayor.”</p><p>“<em>Purr</em>fect! We’ll find this petty cat burglar in no time or my name isn’t Sherlock!” Chat pointed his finger in the air. </p><p>Marinette sighed. This was going to be a long afternoon. </p><hr/><p>“Okay, Chloé, what happened?” Marinette asked once they had all gathered in Mr. Damocles’s office. </p><p>Chloé’s not-so-subtle pressure about calling her father had worked, and the principal had given them his office to work in. She had also got their class out of lessons for the day, which was a win except for the fact that none of them were allowed to leave until Chat Noir’s investigation was finished, or the school day ended. Whichever came first. </p><p>“Hey!” Chat pouted with that stupidly cute kitten face. “I’m the lead investigator here. I’m the one who asks questions.” </p><p>“Then what am I supposed to do?” Marinette asked, placing her hands on her hips. </p><p>“You, my lowly assistant, can take notes.” Chat took some printer paper and a pen from the desk and handed them to her. </p><p>She snatched the items from his hand and moved off to the side, an annoyed expression on her face. </p><p>“Okay, Chloé, what happened?” Chat asked. </p><p>Despite Marinette’s strong desire to ignore everything to do with this investigation, she couldn’t help but listen to Chloé’s tale. </p><p>“Okay, so I was in class …” </p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Testimony #1: <strike>Blondie</strike> THE FABULOUS QUEEN BEE!!! (aka Chloé Bourgeois—superheroine, fashion icon, and daughter of the mayor of Paris)</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Lead Investigator’s Note: Name change was unfairly coerced, but justice will prevail! Take it away, Watson.</em>
</p><p>“Okay, class,” Miss Bustier said, “don’t forget to finish the story during lunch if you haven’t. When you come back, we’ll talk about some of the major themes!” </p><p>Barely waiting for her to finish speaking, Adrien and Dupain-Cheng dashed out of the classroom like there was an akuma. Chloé just ignored their weirdness. Those two had been sneaking off more and more lately. She had been suspecting they were dating for a while, and despite how much it made her want to gag, Adrikins was happy, so she wouldn’t do anything about it. </p><hr/><p>
  <em>
    <strong>
      <span class="u">Case Comments </span>
    </strong>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Marinette: Hey! Adrien and I are not dating! </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Chloé: Yeah, yeah. Whatever, lovebird.</em>
</p><hr/><p>Chloé pulled her phone out of her bag to check her notifications. Her father was having that luncheon with Ladybug and Chat Noir, and she wanted to get there before the heroes had to leave. If that meant she had to miss school, so be it. </p><p>“Is that the Pear Phone 46?” Kanté asked. “The one with a practically unbreakable screen? Seven gigabytes of data ...”</p><p>Blah, Blah, blah. </p><p>Chloé zoned out as Kanté kept babbling about annoying technical jargon that no one cared about. </p><p>“Ughh! No one wants to hear your nerdish ramblings, Max!” she said as gently as she could, moving to the front of the classroom. </p><p>She had to be the guiding voice of reason for the class. After all, if she was going to get her class representative role back, she needed to be respected by her below-average classmates.</p><p>“If you must know,” Chloé said, flicking her hair over her shoulder, “Daddy got me the Pear Phone 46! It’s not even out yet for you peasants!”</p><p>Her classmates all clapped politely in awe, interest on all of their faces. Well, everyone, but Césaire, who was staring daggers at her.</p><p>Well, whatever Césaire’s problem was, Chloé would deal with it another day. She had to hurry to meet her favorite superhero. Maybe Ladybug would be proud of her for being so nice and respectful to her classmates and give her the bee miraculous permanently. </p><p>Stopping at her locker to freshen up her makeup, she set her purse down on the bench behind her. The rest of her classmates filed into the locker room. Césaire, Lahiffe, and Lê Chiên sat on the bench where her bag was and started talking about something, but she didn’t pay it any mind. They probably wanted to bask in her awesomeness. </p><p>Chloé closed her locker and went to grab her purse, when the purse caught on something and slipped from her grasp, spilling its contents everywhere. She yelped as her bottom hit the floor. </p><p>Césaire laughed and knelt beside her. “I bet that hurt. Here, let me help.”</p><p>Césaire grabbed some of the items that had scattered and stuffed them haphazardly into Chloé’s designer purse. Chloé could’ve sworn she’d seen Césaire hide something behind her back, but she didn’t have time to question it. She had a luncheon to go to. </p><p>Mumbling a quick thank you, Chloé dashed outside. Thankfully, Jean Whathisface was there waiting for her with the car. Chloé smiled and reached inside her purse for her phone. There was her bottle of Adrien: The Fragrance. Her favorite pale pink lipstick. Her authentic replica Ladybug yo-yo. Her lucky sunglasses. Even her old bear, Mr. Cuddly. But … </p><p>“WHERE IS MY PHONE?” </p><hr/><p>Chat nodded as Chloé came to the end of her tale. “I see. Well, logically, I have to come to this conclusion.” He pointed dramatically at Alya. ”You are the one who stole Chloé’s cell phone as you were the last one to touch anything inside her purse!” </p><p>Alya surged to her feet. “That lying little witch. That’s not at all what happened!” </p><p>“A predictable claim!” Chat blew into his pipe, causing a slew of bubbles to flow out. It was obvious that he had got too much into his role, for Marinette doubted that he really thought Alya had stolen the phone. Time to rein him in. </p><p>“Chat,” Marinette chided with a frown. “Let Alya share her side of the story. That way we can gather all the evidence we need.” </p><p>“Oh, that’s smart, Watson. Okay, Madame Ladyblogger, enlighten us on what you think happened.” </p><p>Alya shifted her gaze to Chat as she started telling her side of the story. “So, class had just ended and Little Miss Devil Wears Yellow was showing off, as per usual …” </p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Testimony #2: The Blogger (aka Alya Césaire) </strong>
</p><p>“Wanna go to a café for lunch?” Nino asked as Alya packed up her materials. </p><p>“Sounds nice. Too bad Marinette and Adrien couldn’t join us. Would’ve been the perfect time for them to tell us they’re dating.” </p><hr/><p>
  <em>
    <strong>
      <span class="u">Case Comments</span>
    </strong>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Marinette: Why does everyone think Adrien and I are dating? We’re just friends!! </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Alya: Of course you are. And unicorns are parading through the street at this very moment. </em>
</p><hr/><p>“Ughh! No one wants to hear your nerdish ramblings, Max!” </p><p>Chloé’s outburst got Alya and Nino’s attention. Chloé was holding her cell phone up for the whole class to see. She was clearly bragging about some new thing her dad had gotten her.</p><p>Gosh, it was like Chloé was trying to get Alya akumatized again. Who cared about her fancy new phone? It’s not like it made Chloé any better than the rest of them. </p><p>Some of her disgust must’ve shown on her face because Chloé sneered at her.</p><p>Instead of responding to Chloé, which would likely only fuel the fire, Alya ignored her and walked out of the classroom with Nino. Kim ran up to them, talking excitedly about the new <em>Super Penguino</em> game.</p><p>When they got to the locker room, Alya put away the books she didn’t want to take with her to the café. After all, that would be annoying to heave around Paris. </p><p>Nino and Kim were sitting on one of the benches in front of her locker, still talking animatedly. She went to join them. </p><p>It wasn’t until Chloé reached for her purse that Alya noticed Kim had been sitting on one of the straps, which caused Chloé to fall flat on her bottom when she tugged at it. </p><p>“Oh my gosh, Chloé, are you okay?” Alya asked. “Here, let me help you!” She started to grab some of Chloé’s items that had spilled all over the floor, but a perfectly manicured hand stopped her. </p><p>“Stop ruining my things with your filthy poor-person germs. I can pick it up myself.” Chloé sneered, pushing Alya out of the way. </p><p>Alya glared at Chloé. “Does she always have to be such a—”</p><p>“Alya, play nice. You know she’s always like that.” Nino rubbed her shoulders, the surefire way to get her to calm down. That’s why she loved Nino. He was the calm to her righteous fury.</p><p>“You’re right.” Alya sighed. “We should get going before all the café’s get too crowded. See ya later, Kim!”</p><p>With that final farewell, Alya and Nino exited the locker room. </p><p>“So, where would the fine lady like to go for lunch today?” Nino asked.</p><p>“How about—”</p><p>“WHERE IS MY PHONE?”</p><hr/><p>“—and that’s my story,” Alya finished. </p><p>Marinette frowned. “So, it sounds like Chloé thinks you touched her stuff, but you didn’t get the chance?” </p><p>“Yes, exactly! I didn’t steal her phone.”</p><p>Chat glanced at the clock, one leg bouncing up and down in a subtle but agitated manner. </p><p>“Chat?” Marinette said, arching her eyebrow. He was the one who’d wanted to be the leader in the investigation; he should at least share something. </p><p>He plastered on a smile as he met their expectant stares. “Right. Well, the contradictions in both their stories lead me to conclude that none of this happened and thus the phone is not missing. Case closed!”</p><p>Chat quickly clambered out of his seat and attempted to jump out the window, but Marinette yanked on his tail. </p><p>“Not case closed, <em>Sherlock.</em> If none of this happened, where’s the phone?”</p><p>Chat sighed, turning back to where Alya sat at the desk. “Then what do we do now? We’ve got no leads.”</p><p>Marinette picked up Chat’s discarded bubble pipe. “I think we need another perspective on this case. And I know just where to get it.”</p><hr/><p>
  <strong>Testimony #3: Fish Dude (aka Kim Lê Chiến)</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Assistant Investigator’s Note: I have literally no idea what he was talking about.</em>
</p><p>“—so I told him, ‘Hey, that banana isn’t yours. It’s my banana!’” </p><p>Kim and Chat laughed as Kim finished his account. </p><p>“Kim,” Marinette said, putting her hands on her hips, “I asked you about what happened between Chloé and Alya at lunch. “What on earth do bananas have to do with it?” </p><p>“That’s what I was talking about to Nino in the locker room. Or maybe this was something I told monkey genie …” </p><p>Marinette wished she was outside with Alya and Chloé right now. The tension with them sounded better than dealing with Kim’s craziness. </p><p>“Kim, I’m going to need you to focus,” Marinette said slowly, too scared to say anything faster lest he go off on another tangent. “Did Alya help Chloé grab her stuff from her purse?” </p><p>“Nah. Chloé wouldn’t even let Alya near the darn thing. Something about how her hands were too peasant-like.” </p><p>“Did you see anyone else around Chloé’s purse?” </p><p>Kim shook his head. “Nope. I was the only one who touched it, and that was by accident.” </p><p>“Did you steal Chloé’s phone?” Chat asked, leaning into Kim’s face so that his pipe touched Kim’s nose. </p><p>“No way. What would I even need with a second phone? I already have one of my own.” Kim pulled out his phone from his pocket. The home screen lit up to show him and Ondine at the pool, making fishy faces. </p><p>Marinette sighed. “Yeah, Kim didn’t do it.” </p><p>Just then the door burst open. Chloé dragged Alya into the room. </p><p>“Can you arrest her already?” Chloé exclaimed, slamming her fist on the desk. </p><p>“I know she stole my phone!” </p><p>“Chloé, there’s no proof that Alya stole your phone.” Marinette sighed. “Besides, we’re not the police; we are literally a student and a superhero. Neither of us have ever done this before.” </p><p>“All I’m hearing are excuses. Maybe you shouldn’t be in charge of this investigation!” Chloé smirked as if that should mean something to Marinette. </p><p>“I never wanted to be in charge in the first place!” </p><p>Chloé turned her nose upwards. “Hmph, my daddy will have something to say about this utterly ridiculous investiga—” </p><p>A knock from the hallway interrupted Chloé’s rant. </p><p>“Hey, Damocles, found some phone in the locker room. Looks pretty fancy. Can’t believe how spoiled—” The janitor stopped in the middle of his sentence as he realized that it was not Principal Damocles in the office. “Oh, hey, kids.” </p><p>“Chloé, is that your phone?” Marinette asked, irritation filling her voice. </p><p>Chloé walked up to the janitor and plucked the phone out of his hands. “It would seem so.” </p><p>Marinette and Alya simultaneously groaned. </p><p>“So it was the janitor!” Chat lifted one of his eyebrows, slowly bringing his pipe to his mouth. “Case closed!”</p>
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